Thursday, April 12, 2012

To Be or Not to Be? Or is it Even a Question?


This was just a short story I wanted to get out there real fast. Warning: It’s on my dark side again so be prepared to hate me a little bit. But I promise I’ll make it up to you in the end.


Demetrius bowed his head as the priest above him began prayer. His father and mother mumbled along with him, clasping their hands tightly in prayer. His two younger brothers didn’t seem to notice and proceeded to poke and prod each other until the other reacted. The twins fought constantly and it was all his mother and father could do to keep up with them. As one twin shakily pushed the other, Demetrius’ mother opened one eye and shushed them, freezing both of the five year olds in their tracks.

Demetrius closed his eyes again and kept his head bowed. Finally, the group of people before the older priest opened their eyes and raised their heads as the priest moved on. Demetrius tried to listen, but was distracted as usual. He thought about school, and the chores he had forgotten to do, and how messy his room was. He had only turned eighteen last week, and was honestly surprised at how....average he felt.

People always spoke about how when they turned eighteen the first thing they would do is leave home. Or go to college, or date a girl. But Demetrius never thought about any of those things.

His parents had made it clear that he was going to stay at home. They owned a small farm about half an hour away from town. With his brothers to young to do much, he and his father did most of the manual work. Not that he was much help either. He was short, and thin. Weighing only 100 pounds. He could hardly lift the enormous bags of feed, or carry the buckets full of water. He was terrible at riding their horses, and even worse at caring for the more wild animals on the farm. His blonde hair was too long, and though they always spoke of getting it cut, it had just never happened. So it hung down to his shoulders, sometimes hiding his eyes.

When he was fourteen, he had started dating. Secretly of course. His parents were strict, and even cruel at times. He dated a few girls. Never going farther than kissing, and one time feeling up a girl from his class. But no matter how hard he tried, he never understood what the other boys his age were talking about. They all drooled over the young women and their curvy bodies. While his friends looked at the women, he looked at his friends.

It had scared him at first, when he found himself attracted to the other boys, and not the girls. He stared at their growing chests and arms, their untouched bodies. He couldn’t help but be attracted to them. When he and a new kid on the football team had been alone in the locker room, he let everything slip away for a moment, and found himself kissing the young boy. After the boy had run away in fear, he realized what he had done. Still hard from the soft kiss, he panicked and ran from the locker rooms. But not before grabbing a jock strap from the boy’s still open locker.

A week later, his mother had found the stolen jock strap and had told his father. Demetrius had been in his room reading when the furious man came in, belt in hand. Before he could even flinch, his father began laying into him. The belt cracked against his skin, turning it pink and swollen quickly. His father screamed questions at him as he whipped Demetrius with his leather belt, the buckle in his hand.

“Who’s is this? Where in the lords name did you get it? What were you doing with it you filthy pervert?!” He shouted, swinging the belt back and forth with all his might. By now Demetrius had managed to curl into a ball on his bed, trying to shield the delicate features of his face from his father's blows. But nothing could stop the furious man, until he ran out of breath. He stopped, breathing hard. Demetrius slowly uncurled from his protective ball. His father’s face was beet red from shouting and swinging the thick belt. Demetrius blinked away the tears in his eyes before he stuttered out the words he would regret for the rest of his life.

“I-I like boys.” He almost sobbed the three words. His father turned an even brighter shade of red, he turned to leave the room. Before stopping and turning suddenly. He swung the belt one last time, the buckle out now. The gleaming piece of metal struck Demetrius in the eye. He screamed as blood dripped from the wound. He wasn’t ever able to see out of his left eye after that. Forced to wear the dark eye patch that contrasted greatly against his pale blond hair, he never again spoke of his interest towards his own sex. But that never stopped him from thinking.

He watched as the alter boy walked around with incense, burning the familiar smelling sticks. He smiled a little bit, though it did seem fake. He saw the altar boy often, and couldn’t help but stare at him every time his mother and father dragged him to the catholic church. It made it slightly less painful as the priest began his regular speech on homosexuality. He endured the hateful words pouring from the older mans mouth. Several people nodded along with him, sometimes letting out a small ‘amen’ to themselves or those around them. Demetrius’ mother wrapped her hand around Demetrius’ own. He looked up and saw her eyes were closed as she prayed, for him of course. He kept his head down until it was time to leave. He stood and walked down the row of pew’s, his parents close behind. He saw the priest and the altar boy at the exit, saying goodbye to people as they left. He couldn't help the small smile that crossed his face as he reached the boy who looked close to the same age.

"Have a good day." The altar boy said. Demetrius remembered his name was Benjamin.

"You too." Demetrius squeaked out, before his father forced him out the door of the large church.


Demetrius sat up in his room, in his window. He looked out over the fields his family owned and sighed. This was his home, but it felt like anything but. He got out of the window and sat down on his bed, his mind wandering to the handsome altar boy. He had never seen him around school, and figured he probably went to the only other high school in town. He would never forget such a face as that. He pulled off his eyepatch and rubbed his blind eye. He had never gone to the hospital for the injury his father had caused. The eyepatch was lying around in the attic from when his father had eye surgery several years before. His mother had dug it out for him after she managed to stop the bleeding, which took several hours. He stood up and walked into the bathroom. He leaned in close to the mirror and stared at his bad eye. It had long ago turned a miserable looking gray and glazed over. Every now and then it would get sore, but he knew his father would never take him to the hospital. How would he be able to explain it?

“Demetrius, dinner!” His mother called up to him. He slipped the eye patch back over his eye and opened his bedroom door, hurrying downstairs.

He sat down at the table and his brothers soon followed. His father was last inside, coming in as his mother set down the last of the food. He bowed his head as they said grace, before everyone dug into their food. His brothers chatted loudly, his father and mother sharing a few quiet words. He ate quietly, not raising his head to anyone. He winced as his eye throbbed under the dark patch and tried to discreetly rub it, but it didn’t go unnoticed by his mother.

“Is your eye bothering you, Demetrius?” She asked, turning her head.

“No, ma’am.” Demetrius mumbled, before putting another forkful of chicken into his mouth.

“To bad, you deserve it.” His father grunted. Demetrius glanced up at him but said nothing, returning to his food. “Your brothers are ten times better than you.” He said, looking at his squabling siblings. Demetrius kept his head down and ate quietly. “Look up when I’m talking to you, boy.” He reached a hand across the table and pushed Demetrius’ chin up. Demetrius winced but kept eye contact with his father until he removed his hand from under his chin. He let his head fall back down so that he was staring at his plate while he ate quietly.


Demetrius waited until he heard his parents door close, and he quietly got out of bed.  He slipped on his shoes, before swinging one leg out the window. Carefully, he climbed down the tree that was near his bedroom, before hitting the ground. He walked slowly and quietly down his driveway and into the fields attached to his house. He let himself wander through the incredibly tall wheat. His hands were shoved in his pockets and he wandered through the tall yellow plants. They sweeped his body gently and in the distance he could hear chirping bugs and frogs. The air was warm, the summer wind blowing the wheat gently. He walked along side the old wooden fence that separated his property from his neighbors. Every now and then he would trip over a rock, but for the most part the walk was quiet and uneventful.

This was his favorite place in the entire town. He would spend all day and all night out here if he could. The soft sound of the wind through the plants and the chirping bugs. In the center of the field was an old oak tree that he often sat at. He didn’t go there today though, he just took his time walking along the fence line. Besides the bugs, he was always alone. Which is why the voice he heard surprised him.

“Hello.” A light voice said. He jumped and looked around, seeing the altar boy from earlier sitting on the fence.

“Hello.” Demetrius said, it was past midnight. He didn’t know why this stranger was out here. No one was ever out here.

“I was you at church earlier, didn’t I?” The altar boy said. Demetrius gave a small nod. He stared at the boy sitting on the fence, still wondering what he was doing. The boy jumped down onto his side and walked over to him. Stopping a few feet away, his hand raised.

“I’m Benjamin.” He smiled, waiting for Demetrius to take his hand.

“Demetrius.” He shook his hand gently. Benjamin smiled and put his hands in his pockets.

“Can I walk with you?” He asked. Demetrius thought about it. He had never had anyone to walk with before. He usually liked being alone. Maybe he would just try it this one time.

“Sure.” He nodded. He began walking again, side by side with Benjamin. They were both quiet. Hands shoved in their pockets, and stepping around rocks and the occasional large stick. The bugs chirped louder and an owl whoed in the distance. Demetrius had a fleeting thought about it living in the oak tree. He would have to look for it later. “Do you walk out here, a lot?” He asked.

“Not really. This is my first time here. This is really nice though.” Benjamin said.

“It’s my favorite place... You can come here sometimes if you want.” He said, without looking up at Benjamin.

“Thanks. Do you walk out here a lot?” Benjamin asked.

“Yes. Every night.” Demetrius looked up and smiled a little. He knew what he was doing was wrong. He wanted this boy. This man. He had to remind himself he wasn’t a child anymore. He was eighteen, and so was Benjamin.

“That’s awesome. Maybe we can walk together some more.” Benjamin smiled.

“Maybe we can. I should get back, though. I need to be up early to help my father with the farm.” Demetrius said.

“Yeah, me too. I’ll see you later, Demetrius.” Benjamin smiled.

“Bye.” Demetrius waved a hand as he turned and walked back down the way he had came. Benjamin hopped the fence and jogged through the wheat field on the other side of the fence.


Demetrius hid from his father in the wheat field the next afternoon. He leaned against the oak tree and rubbed the bruise forming on his cheek from the blow his father gave him when he had dropped the bag of chicken feed. The heavy bags were to much for him and when the full bag had split open on the ground, his father had been furious. Demetrius now sat in his field, alone. Hiding from the wrath of his father that he would have to face later.

“Hi.” He heard. He looked up and saw Benjamin walking towards him. He couldn’t help but smile a little as he sat down next to him. Benjamin frowned. “What happened to your cheek?” He asked. Before Demetrius could move, he lifted a hand and stroked Demetrius’ cheek gently. Demetrius froze under his touch and the concerned look in his eyes.

“I dropped a bag of chicken feed. My father got mad.” He explained, looking off towards the farm haunted by his furious father. Benjamin frowned.

“I’m sorry....What happened to your eye?” Benjamin asked. Demetrius just shrugged, not wanting to talk about his misery. “I’ve dropped bags of feed too. I’m not the best help around the farm.” Benjamin said. Though Demetrius felt like he was lying. Benjamin was easily four or five inches taller than him, and much larger. He wasn’t fat though, it was all muscle. His tanned skin gave away the hours he spent outside in the sun, where as Demetrius had pale fragile skin that burned under the harsh glare of the sun. It made him feel better that Benjamin cared enough to lie to him. He was so unhappy here, and it was the nicest thing to find a friend, even if he had only really known him for two days.

“Do you ever think about boys?” Demetrius asked, before he could stop himself. Now he had lost his only friend.

“What? Sure, there’s a lot of guys at school who I’m friends with, I guess I-”

“I don’t mean like that. I how we’re supposed to think about girls.” Demetrius said, feeling alone and awkward in his confession. Benjamin was silent for a second.

“I don’t think about girls that way.” He said. Demetrius looked up at him.

“Really?” He asked. Maybe he wasn’t such a freak. If he wasn’t the only one who thought like this.

“Really.” Benjamin nodded. “My parents say it’s a sin. But how can something so right be wrong?” Benjamin asked, staring up at the bright blue sky. Demetrius stared at him before looking up at the sky with him. In their small town, it was rare to find someone you got along with completely. But Demetrius thought he had found that person. In the two short days he had known Benjamin, he was beginning to like him more and more. Maybe to much...

“I need to go.” Demetrius said, standing quickly.

“Wait, Demetrius.” Benjamin stood up and chased after him. “I’m sorry if I scared you, I promise I’m not a freak or anything. Don’t leave.” Benjamin grabbed his wrist gently. Demetrius turned around and looked at him with fear in his only working eye. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I just don’t want you to leave.” Benjamin let his arm go and looked down at the ground, kicking the dirt with his toe. Demetrius swallowed and looked at his home, before turning back to Benjamin.

“I don’t have to go...yet.” Demetrius mumbled. Benjamin smiled and Demetrius smiled back, as the two walked back to their oak tree. Demetrius could only think of it as their oak tree now.


Demetrius opened the front door quietly, tip toeing through the house carefully. The sun had set hours ago, but he didn’t want to leave Benjamin. He knew his parents would be furious, but he didn’t want to leave. He couldn’t leave. They had talked about everything that came to mind. But mostly about themselves. Demetrius told him about what his parents were like, and how he hated his home. He told him about what happened to his eye, and how he was attracted to his own gender, not the opposite. Benjamin had listened quietly, and comforted Demetrius when he began to cry. Demetrius had never cried in front of somebody else before. His father always told him to man up and would beat him if he began crying. Which only made it worse. When the tears began falling, he felt better than he had in years. Benjamin cried with him, quietly and softly.

Benjamin had told Demetrius about his own family. He had eleven sisters, and was the only boy besides his father in his entire family. He helped around the farm, but was generally forgetten since he was the middle child. He had the smallest room in the house, and shared it with two of his sisters. He hated school and never wanted to go, but he didn’t want to stay at home either. His mother and father had forced him to be the altar boy, and he only went along with it because sometimes he would get to miss school for church events. His parents were religious through and through, the same as Demetrius’. Though they never got violent with him, even when they found out about his interest in men. Instead they forced him to attend church three times a week, and kept him away from any boys even close to his own age. Besides that, Benjamin was generally forgotten. He faded into the background, which only made it easier to sneak off into the field he now shared with Demetrius.

Demetrius thought about their long talks and was pondering Benjamins admission to liking boys, when his bedroom light turned on. He jumped as his father crossed his arms, sitting on his bed in the dark. Demetrius swallowed. He knew you were able to see the large oak tree in the field from his bedroom window, and also knew his father had probably seen the two boys together. He swallowed and bowed his head. He knew what was coming long before it finally came. His father struck him across the head, sending the eyepatch flying to the other side of the room. He fell on his side, curled into a ball in fear. His father kicked him several times, aiming for his stomach and sides. He protected his weakest spots as best as he could with his arms. His father spat on him once before he stopped the onslaught of blows.

“You’re a sinner. You’re going to hell.” His father said. “Your brothers are saints. Jesus loves them more than he will EVER love a demon like you.” His father spat the poisonous words at him. Demetrius burried his head in his arms on the floor, feeling a sick mixture of blood and tears falling down his face. His father shut the door with a slam and Demetrius let himself sob quietly. He knew if his father heard him he would only return to beat him again. He never crawled up to the bed. He stayed on the cold hard wood floors of his room, and cried. He didn’t fall asleep until the blood had long since dried and the tears had finally stopped flying. Even as he was drifting off to sleep, he never once regretted meeting Benjamin.

Demetrius stayed home from school the next day. His mother convinced his father to let him stay in his room, though of course he didn’t. The first chance he got, he slipped away into the warm field of wheat. The sun beat down on his shoulders, warming them under the thin white shirt he wore. He had gently scrubbed his face clean of the dried blood, but that didn’t fix the red and bruised skin underneath. His father had hit his nose, and had bruised his arms badly. One wrist was swollen and it hurt to move the aching joint. He fell against the oak tree and slid down the hard wood. He dozed gently and only awoke when he heard the soft breathing and rustling wheat. He opened his eyes and saw Benjamin standing before him.

“Don’t you have school?” Demetrius asked, his voice hoarse from the sobbing the night before, and the sleep he had just woken from.

“I skipped.” Benjamin said, and sat down next to Demetrius. Demetrius’ blinked heavily, he hadn’t slept well on the cold floor, but didn’t have the strength to get up.

“You should go to school.” Demetrius said, eyes closed. Benjamin stared at him quietly for a few seconds before responding.

“I don’t want to.” He said. Demetrius nodded weakly and sighed, his lip quivering. Benjamin wrapped an arm around him and Demetrius leaned into his shoulder. He cried quietly. It hurt his nose, but he couldn’t stop. Benjamin let him cry and tucked his head under his own chin. He rubbed his back gently, and stroked the soft hair on his head. When Demetrius finally stopped crying, Benjamin finally pulled him away from him, and kissed him gently. Demetrius savored the light kiss. He wanted it more than anything, but couldn’t help the rising bile in his throat.

“We cant. It’s wrong.” He pulled away from Benjamin and leaned up against the tree again. He turned over on his left side and faced away from Benjamin.

“It’s not wrong. I love you.” Benjamin said, trying to get Demetrius to turn back around.

“You can’t love me.” Demetrius shook his head.

“But I do.” Benjamin said. “At least look at me, please?” Benjamin asked. Demetrius hesitated, but finally turned back to face Benjamin. Benjamin smiled and put a hand on Demetrius’ bruised one. Something shone in his eyes, and Demetrius realized it was something he had hardly ever seen before. It was love. He craved the look in Benjamin’s warm brown eyes, but he couldn’t accept it. He didn’t want to go to hell. He wanted to go to heaven, and to be loved. He wanted to be happy. A few more tears fell, but as much as he wanted to, he couldn’t cry anymore. “Don’t cry, Demi.” Benjamin wiped the tears away, careful of the bruised flesh on his nose and cheek. Demetrius felt his heart speed up. He liked the way Benjamin said his name. He liked it even more when he used his nickname. No one had ever callled him anything but Demetrius before. It felt special somehow.

He knew his father could, and probably was, watching them at that moment. But he couldn’t help it. He felt like he would die without Benjamin. Each day it felt like more and more of his life was slipping away from him, and Benjamin was the only thing keeping him standing. His body tingled when Benjamin rubbed his upper arm gently. He wanted to kiss him again, but his mind screamed at him frantically. Torn, he didn’t know what else to do. He gave in to his body and fell forward onto Benjamin’s chest.

“Benji...” He whimpered and hugged the other boy. Benjamin hugged him back, glad that he too had found someone. They sat there quietly under the sun, holding each other in silence. A few birds chirped in the clear skies above them, but none of them stayed in the area long. Moving on before either of the two boys below could even really notice them. Benjamin ran his hands up and down Demetrius’ spine. The boy in his arms was thin, even a bit malnourished, but he didn’t even seem to notice. Demetrius opened his eyes when he heard his father calling him. Benjamin squeezed him tight.

“Don’t go, Demi.” Benjamin whispered, as if Demetrius’ father was so close he could hear them. When really he was a long ways away, on the farm.

“I have to. If he goes into my room he could see us. He can’t see us. He’ll get angry. That’s why he did this to me.” Demetrius said. “You should go home. I’ll be okay.” Demetrius smiled warmly, but Benjamin could see the lie in his uncovered eye. Benjamin didn’t know what else to do though. He sighed and nodded. He stood, pulling Demetrius up with him. Demetrius turned to walk away when Benjamin pulled him back suddenly. He hugged him and kissed his lips for the second time that day. Demetrius felt himself get hard and hated himself for it. He wanted to kiss Benjamin again, but he couldn’t. Instead, he turned and walked away. Benjamin watched him walk away for a moment, before turning and leaving too.

Demetrius sat in his room. He was able to sneak in without his father noticing. The sun was just now setting and he couldn’t help but notice he was still hard underneath the blue jeans he wore. He couldn’t stop the thoughts that flooded through his mind about Benjamin. He wanted to taste his lips again, and be held in his arms. But he couldn’t allow himself to think about what he wanted. He couldn’t allow himself the pleasure. He tried to will the erection down but couldn’t, and the more he thought about his need for Benjamin, the worse he felt. He panted softly as he let his hand fall to the waistline of his jeans. He toyed with the button, not wanting to touch himself like he wanted to so bad. He bit his lip as he gave in, shoving his hand past the button and zipper and into his underwear. He whimpered as he stroked his medium sized erection.  The seven inch cock hidden in his pants gave him such pleasure, and also such pain. He thought of Benjamin while he stroked himself, about the warm kiss and warmer hands. He thought about the smile that crossed his face when he called him Demi, and how he had rubbed his back soothingly. He shoved his pants and underwear down to his ankles and stroked himself harder. He couldn’t stop now and let the thoughts engulf him.

He had once seen a porno magazine in a liquor store when his uncle had taken him to get cigarettes. He remembered looking at the beautiful women getting fucked in the pictures, and wishing that he was under those gorgeous men. He wondered what it would feel like to have Benjamin above him, his cock shoved inside Demi’s tight virgin ass. He stroked himself even harder as he thought about what it would feel like to take someone into his ass. His curiosity built as his pleasure did. Before he realized it, he reached a finger back and tried to fill his ass with it. When he was unable to, he brought it forward and hesitated before sucking on the digit and sending it back to his ass again. This time it slid in relativly easily and he moaned as he finger fucked himself and stroked his cock. His release spilled forth and he covered himself and his bed with cum. He sighed and smiled with relief, but wasn’t prepared for the horrible guilt that ate away at him once his pleasure subsided. He felt bile rising in his throat again as he looked down at himself covered in his own cum. He turned bright red and ran to the bathroom, stepping into the shower. He scrubbed himself roughly, until his skin was raw from the steaming hot water and violent scrubbing. He tried to hold himself together but couldn’t stop himself when he began shaking and sobbing. He slid down the shower wall and sat on the ground, the water pouring over him. He sobbed until the water went cold and he shivered in the spray. His father was right, he was going to hell.


“Forgive me father, for I have sinned.” Demetrius said so quietly, that the priest on the other side of the confessional could hardly hear him.

“How long has it been since your last confession, my child?” The priest asked, his voice deep and gentle.

“Uh...I don’t know. A few months?” Demetrius said, his hands shaking. When he had told his parents he was going to church, they looked so relieved. He was tired of the guilt eating away at his stomach. He needed to do something. He just didn’t tell them that it wasn’t their church he was going to, but a different one.

“Now, tell me of your sins my child.” The priest soothed him. Demetrius’ hands shook more and he sighed heavily, even the air shook as it left his lungs in a rush.

“I...I’m having sexual thoughts, father.” Demetrius admitted.

“How old are you, son?” The hidden priest asked. Demetrius felt his heart warm when he had called him son. This complete stranger, and he felt more warmth from him than from his own father.

“Eighteen, father.” Demetrius rubbed his sweaty hands on his pants.

“That’s perfectly normal, my son. There’s nothing to be ashamed of.” The priest said, his voice smiling through the screen between them.

“That’s not it, Father....I’m having sexual thoughts....But not about...not about girls.” Demetrius said, desperate for help.

“Oh?” The priest sounded a bit shocked, like this was something he hadn’t heard much in their small town.

“There’s another boy. A man, really. He’s eighteen like me....The other night....I couldn’t stop thinking about him...He kissed me...” Demetrius put his fingers to his lips, as if he could still feel the kiss there.

“You’re attracted to him?” The priest asked.

“Yes, sir.” Demetrius said, his voice crackling.

“Besides the kiss from him, have you acted on your feelings?” The priest asked. Demetrius swallowed. How much should he tell him?

“I...I touched myself...while thinking about him.” He couldn’t help but let the tears fall as the horrible guilt came back, eating at his insides like a parasite.

“I see...” The priest said quietly.

“Am I going to hell father?” Demetrius asked, through his sobs now. He tried to wipe away the tears frantically but couldn’t clear them as fast as they could fall.

“Of course not, my child. You have come to me for forgiveness and have told me your sins honestly, haven’t you?” The priest asked.

“Yes, father.” Demetrius nodded.

“You’re absolved of your sins, my son. But you must resist your feelings for this boy, and for any other. Keep your soul clean and you will be welcomed into heaven with the rest of the kind people in this town.” The priest said. Demetrius wiped his tears away, only feeling a little bit better.

“Thank you father.” He said. He stood, and left the confessional. He walked down the street quickly, his eyes down. He felt the smallest bit better, leaving with the priests words. He would do as he was told and stay away from Benjamin, even if that meant fighting his own feelings.


His family ate dinner silently, not even his brothers fighting. The only sound in the room was of forks and knives hitting the plates as they dug into their meal. Demetrius wasn’t hungry, and asked to be excused only a few minutes into the meal. He climbed the stairs to his room and shut the door behind him. He fell onto his bed and stared up at the ceiling. He swallowed the lump in his throat and sighed. Before he could even undress, he was asleep.

His dreams were a terrifying mixture of pleasure and pain. Benjamin kissed him and held him in the most glorious ways, but then his face would change into that of his fathers, and would abuse him to no end. He wanted him to go back to the way he was, and to love him again. But all he saw was the hate in those cold eyes. He just wanted love.

He woke with a start as a rooster crowed. He rubbed his eyes and looked down at his wrinkled clothing. He reached for his eyepatch, which had fallen off in the night, and pulled it back on. He dressed quickly and headed out the door. He walked through the fields and headed directly for the oak tree, praying that Benjamin was there. He was.

“Demi.” Benjamin smiled as Demetrius walked up.

“Stay away from me.” Demetrius said. Benjamin frowned.

“Demetrius...What are you-?”

“You’re a sinner and I won’t let you corrupt me.” Demetrius held his head up, though his voice was shaking. He stay a decent way away from Benjamin. Benjamin lost the smile that had spread across his face when Demetrius first walked up.

“Maybe you’ve forgotten, Demetrius. But you felt this way long before you met me. I didn’t do anything to you.” Benjamin glared.

“Shut up.” Demetrius whispered, knowing he was right.

“You’re queer, Demetrius. You like me. Get over it. Why can’t you just let yourself be happy?” Benjamin asked.

“I said shut up!” Demetrius put his hands over his ears, but he couldn’t block Benji’s words out completely. His teeth chattered as he clenched them tight, terrified of Benjamin’s honest words.

“It’s not wrong, Demetrius.” Benjamin shoved him up against the old tree. Demetrius whimpered. Whether it was with fear, or with need, he didn’t know. Benjamin reached his hand down and cupped Demetrius’ hard cock through his jeans. Demetrius cried out, ready to cum just from the single touch. Benjamin kissed him, and forced his tongue into his mouth. “Does this feel wrong, Demi?” He asked, when he pulled away. Demetrius panted and pushed his cock into Benji’s hands. His mouth was open and he couldn’t help the sounds of lust and need that poured for his lips. He shook his head no, wanting release so bad.

“No what?” Benjamin asked.

“N-no.” Demetrius said simply.

“No what, Demi?” Benjamin asked. Demetrius opened his eyes and his body stopped shaking for a second as he held Benjamin’s gaze.

“You’re going to hell.” Demetrius said quietly, and Benjamin saw the belief in his eyes. He didn’t doubt his words. Next to the belief, he saw the hatred. Hatred for his father, and for Benjamin, and for the church and for god. But next to all of that. He saw the pure, raw, self loathing. Demetrius was in trouble, and Benjamin knew it.

Demetrius shoved Benjamin’s hands away and turned around, walking back to his house. Benjamin watched him leave and swallowed, looking down for a second before looking back up. He hoped Demetrius would turn around and come back, but he didn’t. He didn’t even look back.

Demetrius sat in his room in tears. It felt like his body was being ripped apart. Waves of sickness washed over his body as he longed for the soothing touch of Benjamin. But his mind made it clear he was wrong. He wiped away the tears quickly when he heard the knock on his door.

“Yes?” He called out, hoping his voice wouldn’t crack. His mother opened the door and stepped inside.

“Come downstairs, Demetrius. There’s something important we need to talk to you about. Also, there’s someone here to see you.” She said, turning to leave. Demetrius frowned and followed her. He reached the living room as his mother took a seat next to his father. In the armchair to their right, was a man he had never seen before.

“Demetrius, this is Father Martin.” His father said. Demetrius wrinkled his brow, he didn’t know this man.

“Hello, Demetrius.” The father said, and then it struck him. The soothing voice from the confessional invaded his ears and he knew who the man was. But why was he here? His stomach did flip flops as he spoke.

“Hello...What’s going on?” Demetrius asked.

“We...”His mother looked around. “We’re concerned about you, Demetrius. Father Martin says you came into his church the other day and spoke to him about...about sexual feelings...towards...” Her voice cracked and she covered her mouth.

“Towards other men, you sick pervert.” His father spat. Demetrius went pale. He looked at the father and felt tears welling up in his eyes. Confessional was supposed to be private. He never thought the priest would break that rule.

“I don’t mean to bring this to everyone’s attention, Demetrius. I was just worried about you.” The father said.

“Y-you weren’t supposed to tell...” Demetrius whispered. He felt betrayed. He wanted Benjamin. His want only made him hurt more.

“I know, but I Think I have a friend who could help you.” The father said.

“I-i-it was supposed to be a secret...” He couldn’t help the whimper that lined his voice. Now it was out in the open. He could see the disgust in his parents eyes. He wanted to curl into a ball and die right there. He thought that father had said he was forgiven. This was because Benji had touched him earlier. He knew it. He shouldn’t have let him, but he did, and now this was happening. Now he was going to go to hell.

“My friend runs a facility, up north a ways. He takes in troubled teens like yourself and turns them back onto the path of god. He can help you, Demetrius. He can make you see the light. He’ll fix you.” The Father said.

“F-fix me?” Demetrius whispered, though it seemed it went unheard or ignored by the others in the room.

“We’re sending you to this...this facility, Demetrius. It will cure you. You’ll feel so much better!” His mother said, smiling through the tears.

“Cure me?” Demetrius asked, a little louder. “I’m not sick...” He shook his head.

“Yes you are, son. Let us help you. You just need a little help and then you can find yourself a nice pretty lady for you to settle down with.” his father said.

“I-I’m only eighteen I don’t want.... I’m not...I don’t want to!” He said. His father turned the begging eyes into angry ones.

“You’re going. No child of mine will burn in hell. I don’t want to hear a word about it! You WILL praise the lord when you’re in my home!” His father shouted, and slapped him roughly. Demetrius whimpered and put a hand to his cheek. His home felt nothing like home now. Now it felt like a prison. A hole dug by a rodent would be warmer than this horrible place.  “You leave tomorrow morning. Go pack your things and be ready. The cab will come to take you to the airport at seven.” His father said, and stormed upstairs. Demetrius stood in the middle of the room, tears falling down his face. He was sick of crying. It felt like all he ever did was cry. The father and his mother sat there awkwardly. Demetrius slowly turned around and walked upstairs. He shut the door behind him quietly before he slid down the white painted wood. He cried and put his head to his knees. He didn’t want to leave.

As much as he hated himself for it. He wanted Benjamin.

He sealed the envelope quickly and grabbed his bags. The cab would be here any minute and he moved his stuff downstairs. Demetrius had written Benjamin a note, and wanted to bring it to their tree before he left. He ran outside and headed for the field when the cab pulled up and his parents stepped outside.

“Demetrius, where are you going?” His mother asked. He stopped and looked at her before looking back at their tree. He sighed and shook his head.

“No where, ma’am.” He said quietly. He walked back to the cab and was about to get in when a voice called to him.

“Demetrius!” Benjamin shouted. Demetrius raised his head and couldn’t help the smile that formed on his lips.

“Benji...” He whispered, trying to keep the tears of joy from falling. Benjamin ran up to the clearing that served as their driveway. How he knew that Demetrius was leaving, he would never know. He just did.

“Don’t leave, Demi.” Benjamin said. “You don’t have to do what they say. You can be free....” Benjamin begged. “You can be with me. We can go somewhere else, somewhere far far away from here.” Benjamin waved a hand at the surrounding farms. “We can be happy together. We can go to new york, or california. Somewhere where people wont care that we’re together. You can finally be happy, isn’t that what you want?” Benjamin asked. Demetrius swallowed.

“It is what I want...” He admitted.

“Who in the lords name are you?” Demetrius’ father stepped forward. It was only now that Demetrius realized that Benji was the same size as his father. He only seemed smaller to him because he didn’t have the air of menace surrounding him.

“I’m the guy who loves him. He’s eighteen, you cant control him anymore. He’s free to do what he wants.” Benjamin stood toe to toe with Demetrius’ dad.

“Benji...don’t...” Demetrius worried for Benjamin.

“You don’t have to stay here anymore, Demetrius. You can be free.” Benjamin repeated. The word free sounded so right to Demetrius. His entire life he felt like he was in a cage. Like he couldn’t even breathe without someone watching him. But if he went with Benji, there would be no turning back. He would be a sinner, and he would go to hell. He didn’t want to go to hell.

“I can’t....” Demetrius whispered.

“Yes, you can.” Benjamin urged. Demetrius shook his head.

“I...I’m sick. I need help.” Demetrius said.

“No you aren’t!” Benjamin shouted.

“Get out of here!” His father said. “You’re only making my son worse.” His father shoved Benjamin, who swung at him and connected with his jaw. His father stumbled back.

“Benji...just go...please?” Demetrius begged. Benjamin stared at him for a long time.

“Fine. I hope you find what makes you happy.” Benjamin said, turning around and walking back into the wheat field towards the fence that seperated their property.


Demetrius took a deep breath as he arrived at the facility. The ‘Facility’ was really a string of several large buildings. Several young men who looked anywhere from twelve to twenty were wandering around the facility, in and out of buildings. They walked past a few buildings and Demetrius wrinkled his nose as one of them produced a sickly familiar smell. He couldn’t quite place it but shoved it out of his mind. He reached the building used for housing and check in and his stuff was quickly taken from him and he was given four pairs of identical clothes. He looked around and saw everyone else wore the same ‘uniform’

“Go ahead and get changed. You have your first therapy session in a half an hour, hurry up.” The man showing him around said. He nodded and stepped into his room, changing as fast as he could and met up with the man (He had been told his name was Chad) again.


The clothes he was given were starchy and uncomfortable. He was led into a room where seven or eight other men sat in a circle. There was an empty chair where he was obviously supposed to sit. Chad pulled over another chair and everyone quickly made room for him.

“Hello, Demetrius. We were waiting for you.” One man said, he held a clipboard and was obviously in charge. Demetrius didn’t know how he already knew his name.

“Hi.” He waved. The rest of the men greeted him quickly and turned to the man with the clipboard.

“As most of you know, and some of you don’t, this is PPP.” The man smiled warmly. Demetrius frowned and looked around, before raising his hand. “Yes?” The man asked.

“Uh...What’s PPP?” Demetrius questioned. A few people chuckled but the man just smiled.

“It stands for ‘Positive Peer Pressure’.” He explained, and quickly moved on. Demetrius frowned but continued to listen.

“So here we’re going to go over some of our thoughts and feelings and try to positively encourage others in this group to turn away from their sinful ways.” He said. Demetrius looked around. Sinful ways? Everyone else here was thinking the same things as he was? Having the same feelings?

The ‘Positive Peer Pressure’ therapy went on for two hours. One member of the group would talk about their thoughts, feelings, or anything they didn’t like about themselves. Then, the rest of the group would proceed to bash and belittle their problems, usually until the person would break down on themselves. They went around in the circle slowly, until finally, they reached Demetrius. Demetrius was terrified. They had crushed over half the group by now and Demetrius didn’t want the same to happen to him. It was obvious that what they were doing was horribly cruel.

“Go ahead and stand up, Demetrius.” The man with the clipboard said. Demetrius did as he was told and shifted back and forth on his feet anxiously.

“Now tell us about some of your inadequacies.” The man smiled warmly, though his words didn’t match his facial expression.

“Uh, I’m not really comfortable-”

“If you don’t participate, there will have to be severe punishment for your refusal to participate. Your parents are paying a lot of money for you to be here and you’re being a selfish piece of shit for wasting their money.” The man suddenly turned angry, glaring at him with cold eyes. Demetrius’ jaw dropped a little as the man went off on him. He bowed his head and swallowed. He didn’t want to do this. This was worse than what his father was doing to him. He could take physical beatings, but mental and emotional ones were much worse. He already had his mind and body fighting against each other, he couldn’t handle anyone else in his head.

“Uh...I don’t understand why we-”

“Get him out of here.” The man with the clipboard scribbled something down angrily.

“What?” Demetrius whimpered, as two larger men led him out of the room.

Demetrius collapsed on his bed, he had been working for hours. The ‘Severe punishment’ the man had been talking about, had been manual labor. He was taken to one of the larger buildings and led inside. He found it empty and the floors caked with mud and dirt. He was given a piece of sponge smaller than his palm, and told to scrub the floors clean. His fingers blistered and wrinkled under the constant moisture of the water and pressure of scrubbing the filthy floors. His knees hurt from crouching on the hard floor and more than once his tears had been added to the soapy water he was forced to use to clean the caked on mud. His fingers and hands hurt and he desperatly wanted a shower, but he was just too tired. His door suddenly opened and he looked up.

“Excuse me, haven’t you heard of knocking?” he felt his anger flare up a little bit.

“You’re lucky you even have a door. Most people don’t. Come with me.” The rude man said. Demetrius sighed and stood up, following the man.

“Where are we going?” He asked.

“It’s time for your Aversion Therapy.” The man said, without looking at him. Demetrius frowned. Aversion therapy? The man led him to the building he had passed earlier and Demetrius wrinkled his nose at the horrible, yet familiar, smell. The man opened the door and the smell only got worse as they walked down a hallway lined with doors. It seemed as if the hallway went directly through to the other side of the building, and the rooms on the sides took up the rest of the space. About halfway through they stopped at an open door and Demetrius was pushed inside. The door was shut and Demetrius was alone. At least he thought he was until he saw movement in the dark room.

“Who’s there?” He asked, frightened.

“I’m doctor card.” A man introduced himself. He held out a gloved hand and Demetrius shook it. “I’ll be your Aversion Therapist for your entire stay here.” He smiled.

“What’s Aversion Therapy?” He asked.

“You’ll see soon enough.” The doctor smiled and Demetrius swallowed. The Doctor led him over to a very large uncomfortable metal chair that reclined quite easily. He was set so that he was looking at a wall, and only realized that it wasn’t a wall, when the very large T.V. was turned on. He winced at the brightness before getting used to it. The room held the faint sickly smell but it wasn’t too strong.

“I’ll be in that room right there watching you. If you do anything to disrupt your therapy, I’ll be forced to take certain....measures.” The doctor smiled, as if he wanted to skip right to the measures. Demetrius couldn’t hide his fear. The doctor walked towards a door in the room and stepped behind the tinted window. Suddenly the T.V. flickered and it didn’t take Demetrius long to figure out that the movie playing, was a porno. Not only was it a porno, but the stars were two men. They sucked each other off eagerly and Demetrius blushed as he felt himself get hard. How was this supposed to help him? If anything it was making it worse! But it didn’t take long for the smell in the room to grow stronger. Soon Demetrius couldn’t take it anymore and was gagging and trying to shut his eyes from the now fucking men on screen and was trying to cover his mouth with his uncomfortable starchy shirt.

The doctor came in wearing a gas mask and he pushed Demetrius down onto the chair roughly. Demetrius choked as the doctor wrapped his hand around his neck and he felt a thick leather strap tied tight around his forehead. Several more followed as one of the large men from before entered the room to help the doctor. He could do nothing but resist as the men strapped down his head, neck, chest, upper and lower arms, thighs, and calves. Even his feet were strapped down. He was forced to face the movie and endure the horrible gas.

“What is this?” Demetrius asked, as he gasped for air though there was none.

“Ammonia.” The doctor said, words garbled through the mask he wore. He disappeared back behind the tinted glass again.

Demetrius was left alone for three hours.


His misery didn’t end there. For the next three weeks he was forced to do three to six hours of ‘Aversion Therapy’ Every day. It wasn’t always the Ammonia therapy. Sometimes he was forced to talk about his fantasies or the feelings he would have for other men. Sometimes he would be forcefully injected with a syringe filled with a strange yellow liquid. He was never told what it was but it made him vomit for an hours or so, and when there was nothing left to come up, he would be nauseous and dizzy for hours after. While he was under the effect of the mystery drug, he was shown repeated loops of violence, sex, naked men, and more pornography.

The night before he was to leave, he decided he was ready. He no longer thought about Benjamin, or any man for that matter. He was physically stronger from all the labor, and had finally began bulking up in his arms and legs. He didn’t even cry anymore. He was a real man. He had packed his things and was ready to go the next morning, when the door swung open violently. Two men crashed into the room and shut the door behind him.

“What are you-” He was forced down onto the bed and a gag was thrown into his mouth quickly. He struggled against their grip but one of them was clearly much stronger than he was, not to mention two. He wondered what they were going to do, when his pants and underwear were tugged down violently. He shook his head and for the first time in weeks, tears began falling from his eyes. One man climbed on top of him, and he felt a smear of something cold on his ass, before the man forced himself inside Demetrius’ virgin hole. He cried out against the gag as he felt himself being split by the man’s thick cock. He was being raped and there was nothing he could do about it.

“This is a sin!” One man shouted at him. He didn’t know if it was the man fucking him violently, or the one helping to hold him down. He cried out against the gag, and could feel a mixture of lube and blood running down his thighs. “The Devil himself is trying to corrupt you, is this what you want?!” The man shouted at him. He shook his head frantically and the man continued to insult and scream at him until he felt as if he was about to throw up. The man above him grunted and filled his ass with cum. He whimpered and moaned at his torn asshole. The men stood and the one buckled his pants before leaving, removing Demetrius’ gag as they left. He sobbed on the bed quietly for a half an hour before he even tried to move. He whimpered as he moved on of his legs onto the side of the bed, trying to stand up. His ass throbbed and as soon as he stood, he could no longer hold back the bile. He turned and threw up on his own bed, soaking the blanket in vomit. He cried quietly as he stumbled down the hallway and into the public bathroom. He tore off his eyepatch and stumbled into a shower stall.

He scrubbed at his body frantically and watched as the water washed away blood that coated his thighs. He was in more pain than he had ever felt before in his life. Even when his father had beaten him he didn’t feel this bad. He reached a hand back gently and felt his ruined hole. He hissed in pain as the gentle touch from his finger sent pain shooting up his ass and back. He fell to his knees, and could do nothing but cry under the hot water.


Demetrius took a deep breath as he stared up at the wide open blue skies. He had finally returned home. He carried with him none of the bags he had brought when he first arrived. He never knew what happened to them. But it didn’t matter. Those were his old things and he didn’t need them anymore. He was new now. A new man. A cured man. A straight man. He smiled as his mother came to hug him. He shook hands with his father with a smile. His dad had been right all along. He was just sick and needed a little help to get cured.

“Dinner’s almost ready. Why don’t you go up to your room and get settled in and then come down for something to eat.” His mother said, rubbing his shoulders encouragingly. She spoke as if he had just moved in. When he thought about it, he guessed he had. He wasn’t the same Demetrius anymore. Not even close.

Demetrius threw what little he had from the facility onto his bed and sighed as he sat down carefully. It had only been two days ago that he had been raped by the men in the facility. He had no doubt that it was a final part of his therapy. But whenever he thought about it, it made him sick. This time was no different. He rushed to the bathroom and threw up in the toilet. He wiped away the spit and rinsed his mouth out before brushing his teeth. He adjusted his eyepatch and headed downstairs.

The talk around the table was friendly and warm. His brothers didn’t fight, his parents didn’t whisper. They all spoke loudly and warmly, even Demetrius. He was finally happy.

Demetrius had graduated while he was in the facility. His school mailed him his work and he did it between therapy sessions. Though he didn’t have much time. Now he was forced to find a job besides working on the farm, and it was proving more difficult than he thought. Everybody in the little town was working, or otherwise to young to work. For anyone who was just starting to get a job, it was difficult since most were already taken.

He finally found a job as a waiter at a local diner. He was undergoing training when he met Daisy. She had been born in the town, same as him. Now that he thought about it, he remembered her being a senior when he was a freshman in high school. He smiled and flirted with her playfully, but she made the first move when she asked him out on a date. He quickly agreed and just like that, he was in a relationship.

After their fourth date, he took her to meet his parents. They loved her instantly of course and after dinner they decided to go out so the two could have some alone time. Before the car even pulled out of the driveway, Daisy was getting undressed. Demetrius followed quickly and soon they were in his bed, naked. His hands shook as he undid her final bit of clothing, her bra. It snapped open and she smiled as she bent to kiss him. He smiled as he wrapped his hands around her waist, ready for his first real sexual encounter. Not one that he had had when he was sick.

Demetrius sat there in the dark, next to Daisy. She was sleeping peacfully but he was doing anything but sleeping. He stared up at the ceiling quietly. He glanced over at her smiling face and then turned back to the roof. He sighed and then silently stood up. Dressed in only a pair of boxers, he stumbled down the hall and into his parents bedroom. He casually opened the drawer next to his fathers side of the bed and grabbed the semi-automatic pistol his father kept for protection. He checked to see that it was loaded before walking down the stairs. He opened the front door and stepped out onto the cool dirt. He walked towards the large oak tree in the wheat field, careful of the rocks hidden by the wheat. His feet hurt but he didn’t really notice. He reached the tree and sat down with a sigh. He looked out over the wheat field in the darkness of the night. He took off his eyepatch and didn’t expect anything different. He pulled back the slide and the ever familiar clicking sound of a round being chambered climbed to his ears. He put the gun to his head and sat there quietly for a second, just listening to the soft chirping of bugs and the croaking of frogs in the distance. He sighed and closed his eyes. His finger tightened on the trigger.

“Well that’s a shitty move.”

Demetrius opened his eyes and saw Benjamin sitting on the thick tree branch above him. He stared at him silently, not pulling the gun away from his temple. He looked back out over the field. “Go away, Benji.” He said quietly, voice not wavering in the slightest.

“No.” Benjamin said, simply. Demetrius said nothing, and made no move to put down the gun. Benjamin climbed down the tree and sat next to Demetrius. He held out his hand. “Give me the gun, Demi.” He said. Demetrius didn’t look at him. Benjamin slowly threaded his fingers through Demetrius’, careful not to pull the trigger on accident. He forced Demetrius to point the gun upwards instead of at his head. Finally he managed to slip the gun from Demetrius’ somewhat limp hand. Demetrius dropped his hand as Benjamin set the gun down next to his side. He had a sad smile on his face.

“I don’t want to fight anymore.” Demetrius said quietly, his voice still eerily calm. He swallowed loudly.

“I know.” Benjamin said. He scooted closer to Demetrius and pushed his head down so it rested on his chest. He stroked his hair softly for a minute before speaking again. “Do you honestly think what you’re feeling is a sin?” He asked. Demetrius said nothing. “Let me ask you something, Demi.” Benjamin began. “Why would God put you through all this pain? What could you have possibly done, to deserve all of this? Don’t you think he just wants you to be happy?” Benjamin asked. Demetrius still stared out over the field silently.

“I don’t know.” He finally spoke. Benjamin held him as the tears finally came. He sobbed his heart out into Benjamin’s shirt as all the pain and suffering he had been through was finally released. When his tears finally stopped, and he was able to speak, he carefully forced the words out so they wouldn’t crack or waver. “Take me away from here, Benji. I just want to go away.” He whispered. Benjamin nodded and kissed Demetrius’ temple.

“I can do that, Demi. I can make that happen. But I need your help, okay?” Benjamin held Demetrius’ face in his hands. Demetrius nodded. “I need you to go back inside that house, and put this back.” Benjamin handed him the gun. Demetrius looked down at the cold metal and stared. “Just put it back, don’t do anything else with it. Okay?” He asked. Demetrius nodded. “Then, I want you to go upstairs, and I want you to pack ONE bag. With anything that you need. Okay? We won’t be coming back, so make sure you get everything.” Benjamin said. Wait until noon, don’t say anything to anyone. Then meet me here. Okay?” Benjamin asked, making sure Demetrius was still with him. Demetrius nodded, still looking a little spacy.

“Okay.” He said.

“I need you to do all of that for me, Demetrius. Then we can leave and we don’t ever have to come back here.” Benjamin held his face in his hands, and kissed him passionatly. For the first time, Demetrius didn’t feel the horrible guilt eating away at him. He just felt a strange empty void, and the distant throb of love passed to him from Benjamin’s lips.

“Okay.” He repeated. Benjamin stood and helped him up. “I have my own things to do, and then we can go. Remember. Meet me here, at noon.” Benjamin said. He ran off  towards the fence and Demetrius let him go. He turned back to the farm and squinted as he saw the sun rising. The light made his bad eye throb.


He packed his bag with only a few things. A pair or two of clothes, his toothbrush and toothpaste and other toiletries. But not much else.

“What are you doing?” Daisy stretched and yawned, over to his right. Demetrius turned and looked at her, surprised she was up this early. She gasped and covered her mouth. Demetrius remembered he wasn’t wearing his eye patch and quickly turned his eye away. He scanned the floor and found the black patch before slipping it on and shutting the drawer he was gathering socks from. He threw the bag down and looked at the clock. It was only six. He still had six more hours to go.

“Nothing. Go back to sleep.” He said. He figured his parents had gotten a hotel for themselves and his brothers. They were so excited to see him with a woman, they had practically given him the house.

He made breakfast quickly and the two ate in silence. Daisy was still hardly dressed, but Demetrius was ready to go. His boots were on, and he had on his best pair of jeans and his best shirt. After breakfast they watched a movie. Well, Daisy watched. Demetrius counted the hours until it was time. He wondered where his parents were. He thought maybe he would miss them and leave before they got back, but he was wrong. He stood outside, in the sun. The clock chimed noon and he had already been standing outside for fifteen minutes. He had seen Benjamin standing out by the tree and he waved for him to come over, but he stood in the same spot.

Finally Benjamin gave up and ran across the field and onto his property.

“What are you doing? Lets go before your parents get back.” Benjamin said.

“There’s something else I have to do first.” Demetrius said.

“Really? Is it that important cause I just spent most of my cash on a motorcycle and I would really like to- Well shit.” Benjamin cursed, as Demetrius’ parents drove up.

“Demetrius, what are you doing? Who’s your friend?” Daisy leaned out the door of the small country house, finally dressed.

“Who’s she?” Benjamin frowned and looked her up and down. His parents got out of the car and his dad looked furious.

“What is he doing here?” He shouted, pointing at Benjamin.

“Demetrius, how did last night go?” His mother asked excitedly, not even noticing everything else that was going on. His brothers climbed out of the car and began chasing each other around the open space, screaming and shouting the entire time.

“Demetrius, lets have some lunch!” Daisy shouted.

“Seriously, Demi. Who is she?” Benjamin asked.

“Mom, take the boys inside.” Demetrius said.

“What? Why?” She asked, looking at the twins running around and shouting.

“Don’t fucking talk to him!” His father shouted, pointing at Benjamin.

“Fuck you!” Benjamin shouted back. One of the boys tripped behind the car and began crying. The other bent to help him and Demetrius’ mom turned around. His father began stepping towards Benjamin, who was ready for a fight.

“Oh, dear-” His mother said, walking towards the twins.

“Demetrius, I’m hungry.” Daisy complained.

“I can’t believe you sent him to a fucking straight camp.” Benjamin spat at Demetrius’ dad. The twins screamed, Daisy whined, Benji shouted, his mother tsked and through it all no one saw Demetrius pull out the gun. He aimed it steadily, and without a beat of hesitation, pulled the trigger.

The gunshot sounded through the air, scarring up a group of birds from the fields and silencing everyone else. Benjamin stared at Demetrius and thought he had shot himself, when he realized Demetrius wasn’t pointing the gun at himself, but at his father. The older man stared down at the small, but growing, stain on his shirt. He fell back as his once white shirt was stained red.

“OH MY GOD!” His mother screamed, already in hysterics. Daisy screamed and ran inside the house. The twins just stared at their mother, unable to see their father lying on the ground dying. Demetrius walked up to him. He removed his eyepatch and stared down at his father with cold unblinking eyes. Insanity lying just behind the unreal calm.

“Fuck you.” He said quietly, and dropped the gun on his chest, followed by his eyepatch. He picked up his bag and began walking towards the field. His father choked and coughed up blood while watching his oldest son leave. Benjamin stared down at the dying man and then back up at Demetrius, who was walking towards their oak tree. Benjamin hesitated, before shrugging, and following his boyfriend. He caught up with him and fell into stride with him.

“That was a little bit crazy.” He said.

“No. What he did to me was crazy. That, was getting even.” He said, not looking at Benjamin, or back at his dying father.

“Fair enough. You know we’re going to have to deal with this later.” Benjamin said.

“You saw him. He was going to come after us. I have enough scars to prove that he’s been abusing me for years. I won't take his or anyone elses shit anymore.” Demetrius shrugged like it was nothing.

“You know, I really like new Demetrius.” Benjamin smiled. Demetrius face split into a cocky sideways smile.

“Yeah, I do too.”

This is technically ‘The end’ but I’ll come out with an epilogue for you silly people who need real endings ;)

Just for all of you little bitches out there (Just kidding, I even love you guys >.> even if you piss me off a little bit) who are going to say 'well that never happen berp berh ber!' Yes it did -.- These are real things that happened in 'Conversion Camps' Maybe not all of them, but that's like saying all Nazi camps were as bad as Auschwitz. They still fuckin' suck >:I Hope you enjoyed :D


  1. A disturbing story, but I'm sure you know that. It definitely makes you cringe a bit and think, but, as usual, it's well done with fully realized characters and story line. Thank you.

  2. Wow, just wow.. I can't believe camps like that exist.. Poor ppl who gets sent to places like that... Makes me cry and lose a chunk of faith in ppl.. But as always good story, you bring forth thoughts over the state of things, but you also in other stories bring forth joy, sadness, hope and more.. I'm so glad I stumbled over your stories on Lit. :) keep up the amazing work, sweetie

  3. As always a provocative story. Sad that this could be happening right now somewhere in the world and probably is. One day it won't. One day.

  4. I'm glad you didn't kill Demi, because initially I thought you were going to...and then I would have had to hurt you in your sleep ;) wub you :P

  5. Whoa. I also thought you were going to kill your main character, which always makes me want to kick someone's ass.

  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

  7. Amazing story, dark yes but all the more powerful for it.

  8. Interesting.....sad.....but Interesting

  9. I loved the story, but the colour contrast between the text and the background is really hurting my eyes.